a hundred visions and revisions

This happened a few days ago when it got really cold here. It was a slow night, so those of us working at the desk had some interesting conversations. Around 7:00, Maurice comes in saying that it's snowing outside. I run out to check and, sure enough, snow is coming down in little flurries. But Jon doesn't get outside to check until a while later, by which time it's stopped snowing. For the rest of the night, he insists that Maurice was making it all up.

Jon: I don't believe you about anything anymore. You were lying about the snow. I think you got snow confused with stars.
Maurice: You just couldn't see the snow, because you didn't believe enough.
Me: It was falling all around you and you were blind to it. Open your mind to the snow!
Evan: Yeah, it's like Polar Express or something.
Lauren: What??
Evan: Uh, yeah, I don't know where I was going with that.
Jon: I still don't believe you guys.
Me: Every time you say you don't believe in snow, a snowflake dies.
Evan: Quick, clap your hands! Put on your gloves and clap your hands!
Me: I do believe in snowflakes! I do! I do!

Wow. *dusts off blog*

It's been way too long since I've updated this thing. I've been busy but happy lately. I've started my new job as a young adult librarian at the Normal Public Library, and it couldn't be going better. I love my coworkers, and the teens are great. I promised Alida and the others at ACPL that there's no way that the teens anywhere else could beat them in awesomeness...well, I'm sorry, Alida, but these guys do come pretty close! I miss everybody at ACPL still, of course, but I'm starting to feel really settled in here, and I'm excited about future possibilities with this job. I'm the sole young adult librarian here, so I'm in charge of everything in the department, as well as helping out with general adult reference duties. There's a lot of stuff to learn, and sometimes I feel so inexperienced when confronted with all of these new duties, but I'm also glad to have this opportunity. Luckily all of my coworkers have been great about helping me learn the ropes. There's just a lot I'll have to learn as I go along. I'll post again soon with more details about the job, but when I realized how long it had been since I'd updated my blog, I wanted to make sure to at least post a brief message to prove I'm still alive.

A lot of crazy stuff has been happening, so this post is going to be a jumble of sorts. First and most importantly, I'm moving tomorrow - and I still have about a million things to do before then, of course. My parents and grandparents are helping, and between us we've got two minivans, a pickup truck, and my little car, which we're hoping to be able to cram all of my stuff into. I hope it all fits.

Yesterday was my last day at ACPL, and it was very bittersweet. I spent my time playing Euchre and Rock Band with the teens - best last day ever! But it was horrible to say goodbye to everyone there. I've loved working at ACPL, and am going to miss all of my coworkers and the teens there so much. I wish I could take them all with me.

I've spent the past several days working hard on finishing my new furniture. A few weeks ago, I went to an unfinished furniture shop in town and picked out a new desk, dresser, TV stand, and bookcase. I did all the staining myself - I got a beautiful dark espresso stain, and it looks great on the pieces. Now I'm scrambling to finish up the polyurethane coats so that they'll be dry in time to pack them in the vans. Maybe I'll post pictures of them in use in my new place once I've settled in. Oh, and I also bought a sofa and chair - no more ugly flowered hand-me-downs from my parents, hurrah. I'm so proud of all my new grown-up furniture!

So, I guess it's about time to mention that I've been offered the job in Normal I talked about in my last post. It happened so quickly that I'm still a little shocked. We've tentatively set my start date as August 4, and last Thursday and Friday my parents came with me to Bloomington-Normal to look around at the area and hopefully find me a place to live. I wanted to live close to work, but unfortunately the vast majority of the apartments around uptown Normal are either heavily student-oriented (Illinois State University is literally right next to the library), or they're Section 8 housing, i.e. rent-controlled, and for the first time in my life, I'll be making too much money to qualify. (!!!) So I ended up looking further south in Bloomington, where apartments were quite a bit more expensive but also nicer. There was one apartment complex I really liked, but they were completely full and had a waiting list, so it didn't look like there was a chance I could get a place there before I'd need to move. But it just so happened that as I was in the leasing office, one of their residents came in saying that he wanted to do a sublease for July and August, and I pretty much jumped up and down yelling "Ooh! Pick me! Pick me!" So we talked it over and worked it out, and now I have an apartment. I'm going to try to head back this weekend to do some cleaning and hopefully move a few of my things in, and then in two or three weeks I'll move over there for good.

It feels like everything has really fallen into place perfectly for me to have this job. I hope I like the job and the Normal area. It's not terribly far from Chicago, and there's a train that goes straight there, so that'll be nice. And it's about four hours away from my family and friends here in Fort Wayne, which makes weekend trips very possible. I'll miss ACPL and the people there a lot, but overall I'm excited about this opportunity. Now I'm just incredibly nervous and worried about doing the job well. I hope I don't disappoint!

I haven't posted in a bit because things have gone sort of crazy for me. I've mentioned on here before that my job at ACPL is currently only part-time, and that I've been hoping for more hours for a while now. Well, a couple of weeks ago, I was browsing through some library job sites and almost on a whim, decided to apply for a couple of young adult positions I found. Within a few days, I had been contacted for a phone interview by the people at the Normal Public Library in Illinois. A few days after that - this Tuesday - I went to Normal for an in-person interview. The job is a full-time young adult librarian position, and I would definitely be making quite a bit more money than I do now. The interview went well, I thought, and I liked the people at the library. It's definitely a much smaller place than ACPL, and I would be the only full-time YA librarian, with maybe a student worker to assist me. Bloomington-Normal seems like a nice area - the two cities combined have a population of around 120,000 people, it's about two hours from Chicago, and about four and a half hours from my family in Fort Wayne. I'm not sure what to hope for at this point - part of me still has a tiny hope that something full-time is going to open up at ACPL so I can stay in the area, but the rest of me realizes what a great opportunity this job could be. I probably won't find out whether or not they'll offer the job to me for a few more weeks, so meanwhile I'll be nervously waiting. Everyone wish me luck!

Today, as a class instructor was bringing me over to help one of his students with a reference question, he said to them, "The librarians that work here are GODS!" Um, talk about pressure.

Also, I'm not sure what's worse - that one of our teen regulars at ACPL guessed my age at 29, or that he's not far off. I'm not old enough to be this old!

Obviously it's been a while since I've posted. I don't know what it is about this time of year that seems to make me forget all about my blog. Anyway, things are going well. I really like my job at ACPL, and classes are moving along as smoothly as can be expected when I spend half of my week in Fort Wayne and half in Bloomington. Oh, and I'm thinking about applying for a part-time position in the circulation department at ACPL. It doesn't pay nearly as high as a librarian position would, of course, but the hours would work well with what I'm already working there, and it looks like there probably won't be any full-time librarian positions opening up at ACPL in the immediate future anyway. I emailed the HR director there about it, so we'll just have to see what happens.

I don't know about anyone else, but this election season is exhausting me. Part of the reason, I'm sure, is because I've paid far more attention to things this election cycle than I ever have in the past. And I've spent a good part of that time knowing only one thing for certain - that I wouldn't be voting for McCain this fall. As far as I'm concerned, McCain has shown over and over again that he's more than willing to just continue down the path Bush has been taking us on, and that is NOT what this country needs. I've been leaning back and forth between Clinton and Obama for quite a while now, unable to make up my mind. I'm sure many of my conservative friends and family members would disagree with me (you all know I love you anyway! ;), but I honestly think either could potentially make a good president - at the very least, they'd likely be ten times better than the one we've got now! In recent days, I had been starting to lean towards Clinton, actually, although both definitely had moments of enraging me - the last thing I want is for things to descend into mean-spirited personal attacks, and it was looking like it was going to go that way. Both were saying things about the other candidate that really rubbed me the wrong way, Obama especially, I have to say, although Clinton's certainly done her fair share. Enough with the racist and sexist dogwhistles, everyone! Racism is a problem in this country. So is sexism, definitely. But I think it does everyone a disservice if we, the media, or the candidates try to make this election season about who's had to put up with more crap, blacks or women. So while I started this season with hope, that was definitely starting to fade a little bit as both candidates became more tarnished. But now Obama's gone and made one of the best speeches I have heard in a long while. Of course, we all know that being a great speaker (or having great speechwriters) does not necessarily a good president make, but I have to admit I would FAR rather listen to Obama speak over George W. Bush anytime - it's gotten so I can barely stand to watch Bush's speeches anymore. Anyway, I'm definitely weighing a lot more in my considerations than just speechmaking, obviously, but do you know how long it's been since a speech made by a political figure brought tears to my eyes? Now I'm getting a little bit more excited again, especially about the possibility that my primary vote might actually count for something this year. Anyway, see for yourself - here's Obama's speech on race, religion, and America's future, given today in Philadelphia:



If you can't watch the video or don't have the time, you can also read the text of his speech in full here.

You might have noticed that I haven't updated my blog in a couple of weeks, mostly because life has gotten substantially busier and more interesting for me of late. Last week, I started my new job in the young adult department at the Allen County Public Library, and I can tell it's going to be a good fit for me. Of course, I already had experience there from my internship this summer, but this time I'm working as a REAL librarian, for which I'm being paid REAL money - definitely an improvement! I even get my own email account and phone extension - wow! My coworkers in the department are all great and have been very welcoming and willing to answer any dumb questions I have as I start to settle in. The teens there are pretty much made of awesome, and it's been fun to catch up with a lot of the regulars I remembered from this summer. They seem happy to see me back, too - one kid told me the other day that I'm a "pretty okay librarian", which I think was a huge compliment coming from him (By the way, if you want to get a taste of what our teens are like, check out the YA department's blog - it usually features some, ah, interesting discussions in the comments).

There are only a couple of downsides to the new job - one, of course, is the long drive back and forth between Bloomington and Fort Wayne every week, but that's only going to last for the next couple of months until I finish up grad school for good. The other is that it's only a 15-hour a week position, and there's no guarantee that there are ever going to be any more hours available. I'm keeping an eye out for other positions within the ACPL system, because I really like the library and it'd be nice to live close to my parents, but I also need to be making a lot more money than I'd make if my hours stay the same as they are. So I'm hoping that something will come up that will enable me to stick around - even if it means going back to Mitchell Books or taking another part-time retail type job - definitely less than ideal, but we'll just have to see.

So the job interview yesterday went really well and I now have a job with the young adult department at Allen County Public Library. I'll be covering the reference desk and also helping to coordinate their Homework Help program - working to set things up with the adult tutors who come in, keeping stats, etc. It's only for 15 hours a week, but with a strong possibility of more hours eventually becoming available after I graduate. They want me to start right away, and luckily the hours they need me and the hours that I'm available worked out well enough that I'm planning to spend Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays in Fort Wayne working at ACPL, and the rest of the week in Bloomington finishing up my last semester of library school. It'll be kind of awkward, but it's manageable, and it's only for the three months until I graduate. Then, once I officially have my MLA, my pay will go up by about a third - nice! Plus not having to pay big bucks in gas money, of course. I'm also under no obligation to stay if I find a full-time job elsewhere before they're able to offer me more hours, although ideally I'd love to stay within the ACPL system if it's at all possible. So overall, it looks like it's going to work out really well for all involved, and I'm excited!

So...I got a call from the Allen County Public Library yesterday asking me if I was available for an interview on Thursday morning for the position I applied for. For those who aren't up-to-date, this is the 15-hour-a-week position in the same young adult department that I interned in this summer. The job would be perfect if it were just full-time. Still, I applied, because it'd be a foot in the door and hopefully more hours would come along sooner rather than later. We'll see - that's some of what we're going to talk about in the interview. So I'm heading back to Fort Wayne tomorrow night. I've got Fridays off this semester, so I'm planning on just spending a long weekend with my parents before coming back down to Bloomington. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

This weekend I spent a bit more money than I was intending to do (not to mention, I royally screwed up my attempted diet). Friday, Kate, Terra, Jesse and I met for brunch at the Runcible Spoon, which is one of my favorite restaurants here in Bloomington - I love their breakfasts. I had a huge and decidedly not low-fat meal including eggs, homefries, and French toast. Then Friday night I went out for milkshakes with Annie and Elissa and finally got to see Sweeney Todd. I really enjoyed the movie - it's one of my favorite musicals anyway, and I can't think of a director better suited to the show than Burton. I was pleasantly surprised by Johnny Depp's singing ability - his voice isn't anywhere near as strong as the various stage Sweeneys, but I think he did it justice. And Alan Rickman! They tried their hardest to make him repulsive, but you just can't take the sex out of Alan Rickman. His and Depp's duet on Pretty Women was probably the high point for me. You could tell the whole theater was really involved in the story, too - in fact, when Anthony burst in on Sweeney about to kill the judge, someone down in the front row yelled "OH SHIT!" I'd definitely recommend Sweeney Todd to anyone who likes beautiful music, creepy atmosphere, and doesn't mind liberal amounts of ridiculously over-the-top blood and gore. Heh.

On Saturday Kate and Sarah and I went to see a completely different type of film - Atonement. It's a beautiful film - I thought the cinematography was gorgeous, and I liked the way that ambient sounds were used in the score. Also, James McAvoy is kind of Hot, at least in this movie. But dear lord was the ending depressing. I even teared up a little, and I'm not typically the type that cries at movies. I can't imagine it's not going to be getting Oscars. Otherwise, there aren't too many movies out right now that look that interesting to me. I still kind of want to see Juno, but it's been so hyped that I'm afraid it'll be disappointing. Besides, with all the money I spent this weekend, I should probably go low-key for a while. I guess I'll just snuggle up at home with my Flight of the Conchords DVD and my knitting.

Well, I'm with the folks for Christmas now, and no sooner did I get home than a huge snowstorm rolled through. I think we got around 8-10 inches total. The snow's stopped now, but it's windy so it's blowing everywhere. I hate the feeling of being holed up inside on a day like this. It didn't bother me when we were kids because we got off of school and we could go out and play in it, but somehow now, even if I know I'm not going anywhere, I like having the option of getting in the car and heading out. Still, snow! I hope it sticks around until Christmas, or we get another dumping before then. Christmas doesn't seem right without snow. Amy and Rich have got to fly in this weekend, though, so I hope nothing causes their flights to be delayed.

My plans over Christmas break are to try and get started on the whole job hunt thing. I'm not sure how soon I should be applying for public library jobs, given that I'm not finished until May, but I'm ready to start the search. Wish me luck.

In my last post, among other things I whined about all of the high school library instruction sessions I had to do this week. Admittedly, they're time-consuming in a week where I already had too much going on, but in reality, now that I'm not in such a grumpy mood, I have to mention how much I've enjoyed doing library instruction this semester. My high school students this week have been especially great - they've listened, they actually act interested in what I'm teaching them, and I feel like some sort of Library God imparting my wisdom to bright young learners. Well okay, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration, but I do like the feeling of introducing so many new research tools to students whose first thought is to try Google or Wikipedia. It probably shouldn't be surprising to me that so many people don't have a clue how to get started on library research. I thought I knew what I was doing during my undergrad years, and I hated to ask for help, but I know so much more now than I did then, and I at least had spent a good amount of time in the library and was familiar with the basics, unlike some of these students. And now I get to teach them everything I've learned!

One thing I've noticed is that as my confidence in my teaching ability has increased this semester, I've gotten much more hands-on in my approach. At first, I pretty much just stood up at the front and talked at them, but lately I've really been working hard to get some interaction and activities into my lesson plans. For example, this week with all of my high school classes, I've started with a group brainstorming session, and had the students practice setting up searches by writing out their research topic in a sentence, pulling out what they think are the important keywords, and coming up with multiple synonyms they could also use. Then I had them string various keywords together using Boolean operators, what fun! I've been really lucky so far in that my classes have all been pretty willing to participate - there's nothing worse than having every attempt at getting your students involved fall flat while they just sit and stare at you.

At any rate, I'm pretty sure I wowed today's classes with my awesome super powers, like the ability to type really fast, and fix a computer by hitting it, and, of course, my impressive Middlemarch reading skills (they're working on a paper on Middlemarch, although I got the impression that none of them had actually read the book yet. When I told them I had to read it in a week AND write a paper on it, I could tell they thought I was the coolest ever. Or maybe that's the lamest ever, it's hard to tell the difference sometimes). This Friday I'm teaching a group of students who have to do various papers on environmental topics, and then I think that's it for the year. I'll definitely be doing this again next semester, though - it's been a great experience.

I am a grump right now, and I feel like whining.

Okay, first of all, all of my appliances seem to have decided to die at once. My CD player refuses to play my CDs, the microwave only works if I stand there and hold the door closed the whole time, and my TV has started its loud buzzing thing again. I can understand with the TV and CD player - they're both fairly old, as electronic-type things go, but the microwave's only two years old. So frustrating! I know that compared to how the vast majority of the world lives, these things are all luxuries - but as a grad student who doesn't particularly want to spend a lot of time in the kitchen, my microwave at least sure seems like a necessity.

Also, I've lost my student ID card. It was in my coat pocket and I think it either fell out during the walk to campus, or somewhere in the library. I've checked everywhere, and it hasn't turned up. My ID card is what I use to be able to ride the bus without paying, so for the past few days I've had to spend 75 cents each way on that. Plus I can't check out any books right now and um, hello? Library student! I haven't gotten a chance this week to go and get a new one made, so I guess I'll have to do that first thing Monday.

Also also, Carrie had asked me to take on several pretty involved high school instruction sessions, which I gladly agreed to do - until I realized that all four are during the week after Thanksgiving, when I've also got a couple of my end-of-semester projects due. Plus my regular class and work schedule. So it looks like that'll be a fun week!

Finally (and this is going to sound ridiculous, I know): I've been feeling kind of old lately. I know, it's crazy for a 26-year-old to be whining about feeling old, but...where have my 20s been going? I just don't feel grown-up enough for so many years to have passed by already. I don't know - I guess it's just that, if you'd asked my 16-year-old self (or my 22-year-old self, for that matter) what 26-year-old me would be like, I think I would have pictured myself as a lot more mature and accomplished and all that. What exactly have I done so far, in 26 years? Have I really done anything worthwhile? Are the next ten years of my life just going to be more of the same old, same old? I'm deathly afraid of just stagnating, settling in, not striving for anything more than what I've got now. I think I have tendencies that way. I like to be comfortable, and I fear big changes so much - but keeping things the same just ends up making me feel miserable, like I'm wasting my life. I guess I thought that adulthood was going to be different somehow, that it would phenomenally change me, but instead I just feel like an old, very slightly wiser version of 16-year-old me.

Apparently it's David Bowie Day for me, or something. All through my ref desk shift today I had the Magic Dance song from Labyrinth stuck in my head. Then I came home and it switched over to Flight of the Conchords' Bowie's in Space. Apparently my brain can't resist the power of the Bowie (or Bowie impersonators).

Some of my friends and I have started a new game. It's called Count How Many Girls On Campus Are Wearing Uggs. Today while waiting for the bus I counted thirteen - five of whom were wearing Uggs with leggings. I thought the whole Uggs thing was supposed to be out of style already...please?

No real news yet on the job front. I did hear back from the HR department, and they've received my application but aren't at the stage to start interviewing candidates yet. So...keep on keeping your fingers crossed!

Whoops - I haven't updated in a while!

The semester's really heating up for me at this point. I'm taking a couple of classes that are really heavy on theory this semester, and both involve a LOT of reading and several papers each, so I've spent a lot of time holed up writing. They're both interesting classes for the most part, but my third class, public library management, is by far my favorite, partly because of the instructor - I had him last year for reader's advisory and really enjoyed him - and partly because it's much more practical and I feel like I'm really learning things I'll be putting into practice on the job.

Speaking of jobs, I've applied for that position with ACPL that I mentioned here. It may not amount to anything, since I don't actually graduate until May, but several people convinced me that I should go for it anyway, so I did. Everybody keep your fingers crossed for me!

It's finally getting chilly. I complained enough about the heat (when it's 90 degrees on your birthday in October, things are a bit ridiculous), but now I find I'm not ready for it to be cold outside yet, either! I keep forgetting my jacket - I'll wear it to class or work, hang it over the back of my chair, and then take off without it. I haven't gotten it into my head yet that we're heading into winter.

I've decided that I'm going to go ahead and at least write a letter of inquiry to ACPL about the job I posted here the other day. Sure, I'm not really available until May, and they'll likely want to fill the job before them (They may even be planning to hire from within the system, they seem to do that a lot) - but it at least can't hurt for them to know that I'm interested in working there, if more positions become available later. I'm also hoping to volunteer at the library over Christmas break. Anything I can do to keep my name fresh in their memory, right? So wish me luck! Oh, and thanks for the encouragement, Joel and Joel.


In other news - remember that horrible, disgusting cold I had? No sooner did I finally get rid of it than I caught another one. Ugh.

So I did my internship this summer at the Allen County Public Library in Fort Wayne, working in the young adult department, and I really enjoyed it. I'm interested in YA librarianship as a career, plus Fort Wayne is where my parents live and where I lived before I moved to Bloomington, so I'd kind of like it if there's a possibility of getting a job with ACPL when I graduate in May. I was looking around their website just now and saw a job opportunity posted that drives me crazy, because it's exactly along the lines of what I would apply for - but it's probably at least six months too early for me. Check it out:

NEW HAVEN BRANCH ASSISTANT MANAGER
Full-time assistant manager at the New Haven Branch. The schedule for New Haven Branch assistant manager will include day, evening and weekend hours. The range minimum for assistant manager is $35,547 and up depending on experience. There is a relocation allowance. If you are interested in applying for New Haven Branch assistant manager, you must have an ALA-accredited master of library science degree, along with training and/or experience with young adults. Some experience with children is a plus. Excellent interpersonal communication skills are necessary for working with people of all ages and backgrounds. Applicants should have a genuine liking and understanding of teens as well as the general public and a strong general knowledge of a variety of subjects, including popular fiction. A thorough understanding of internet search techniques and the Windows environment is needed. Bilingual ability in Spanish or an Asian language is desirable but not required. Responsibilities of the New Haven Branch assistant manager include providing reference and readers’ advisory assistance to patrons of all ages, working particularly with young adults through outreach activities and development of the YA collection, planning and presenting programs for both adults and teens, supervising the branch’s strong volunteer program, supervising the branch in the absence of the manager and serving on various system-wide committees, as well as other duties as required.

Tonight I went over to Kate's house for a barbecue, with her roommate Kirsten, Kirsten's boyfriend Jeff, who manned the grill, and fellow SLIS student Terra and her fiance Jesse. Terra and Jesse brought along their new puppy, an awesome little Scottish terrier named Dexter. He was SO excited to see all of the new people, and we had a blast playing with him. I can't imagine trying to take care of a dog with so much HAIR, though. At one point he got into a bush with little burrs, and you can imagine how much fun it was to try to get all of the stickers out of his fur. His little mustache is adorable, though.

Classes start tomorrow! This semester I'm taking three courses: Public Library Management, Computerization and Society, and Representation and Organization of Knowledge and Information. For that last class, we're required to read this article before we first meet: "When essence becomes function: post-structuralist implications for an ecological theory of organisational classification systems." That'll be fun bedtime reading.

I'm also going to be keeping up my job at the reference desk in the Information Commons. In addition, I've signed up to be a library instruction assistant, which means that when instructors bring their classes to the library for a session on research skills, I'll be one of the ones who will teach the classes. I'm pretty nervous about this job - I am NOT a natural teacher. But library instruction is something that will probably come up in any future job I have, so I think it's important for me to get some practice in and develop a skill that I'm not so good at right now. But oh, I'm so freaked out about teaching undergrads!